We know, we know — Bright Lights is the last place you'd expect to hear such talk. And it's true that we spend most of our time drinking cordials and reading The Imitation of Christ. Don't blame us; that's how we were raised in one of America's many cultured homes. Remember them? But now that we're "at war," we feel compelled — and will very soon — don mufti (we have a designer working on something special), take up (antique) firearms, and proceed into battle. America's honor needs defending now, it seems, and Bright Lights is ready! We'll rely on you readers to inform us where the next battle will be — location, if the terrain is very rough, bathroom locations, whom to kill, etc. — and we'll see if it doesn't conflict with previous plans. The twelfth of never is usually open.

During lulls between watching old war movies and exercising (we use the spa scenes in The Women as our guide), we've managed to whip up a big new issue of Bright Lights. In our obsessive need to be "in the now," we're covering a number of new films. BL associate editors Alan Vanneman and Robert Keser stick their bayonets in, respectively, Batman Begins and War of the Worlds; and SpongeBob SquarePants, Mad Hot Ballroom, and Princess Raccoon. BL newbie Shari Last takes aim at The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and the latest in the endless Star Wars series. Another fresh face here, Dana Levanthal, lobs a grenade at the misogyny of Sin City.

The articles antechamber features Bob Castle returning after going AWOL the last few issues with a bracing take on the sociology of The Truman Show. Dan Callahan, who feted Jane Fonda last time, digs deep into the life and career of the incomparable, unjustly forgotten Margaret Sullavan. Recent recruit Lesley Chow thoughtfully tours the pleasures of Elmore Leonard-based cinema. Tom Sutpen, one of our treasured recent recruits, demands that somebody (well, Universal, who owns the rights) distribute Peter Watkins' brilliant, and sadly repressed, Privilege. And Arnaud Desplechin gets the once-over three times this issue, with fine analyses of Kings and Queen by former BL MIA A. Jay Adler and new contributor Damon Smith, who also did a revealing interview with Desplechin.

The features foyer is a mine-field of fun, with Vanneman gingerly exploring Chaplin's Mutual films; associate editor Megan Ratner handily negotiating recent German films on the Nazi era; and first-timer Jason Sperb finding new pleasures in On Her Majesty's Secret Service.

In addition to the Desplechin chat, we have Lars von Trier being almost indecently candid with BL newcomer Karin Badt, and Darren Stein discussing his fun doc Put the Camera on Me, about his career as a pre-teen gay Orson Welles.

Entering the vale of video brings us to Matt Kennedy's arch analysis of two Jacques Becker films, along with recent BL arrival Sheila Skaff writing authoritatively on late Polish cinema. More new cinema can be found in two film festival reviews: Joanne Bealy skirmishing with the San Francisco International, and Cleo Cacoulidis parrying with the Human Rights Watch fest. Yours truly takes on Jenni Olson's excellent poetic doc The Joy of Life, along with the usual "Little Stabs of Happiness" round-up. More experimental works, by Austrians Oliver Ressler and Gertrude Moser-Wagner, are artfully analyzed by recent recruit Robert Grossman.

Meanwhile, your editor commandeers homo corner for articles on Arthur Dong's doc Licensed to Kill, about queer-killers; and Fred Halsted's S&M porn career— and finds much to love in the work of brilliant documentarian Kim Longinotto.

Now, if you'll excuse us, we have a lovely cordial waiting.